Dear MUB,

You need fu tell all the man inna them inna Antigua fu tap walk and buy gift for them woman when you hear Valentines come because it come in like a requirement right now. Me min inna one relationship with ma 3rd catty for 4 years before me meet this new one last year November because mi just couldn’t kip up with she jack because all of a sudden she just start complain how me cya satisfy she.

MUB, mi find that one dey strange because fu mi penis never shrink and she na hab no pickney so me expect the hole fu remain the same size. So, you tell me how all of a sudden mi can’t satify she. Look, me just tell she go find one horse tool man and leave me alone.

But the point I want to bring across is, I never once in the 4 years had to buy her anything for Valentines day but this new one from since February start are give me list of things she could potentially want fu Valentines. MUB, mi a say a joke the gyal a joke. She came over by me last night and just a search down ma place. Me tell she me na buy nothing and she just can’t seem fu get um in she head. She just a tell me tap play and tell her wa ma hide um. When she realize ma serious she push up she face and go lie down.

MUB, mi tek off ma clothes and go lie down beside she ready for the action and she a tell me na touch she cuz mi na buy she no gift. Mi na min wa fu believe that she serious so me try touch she again. MUB, you know the gyal get bex, tek up she subben and left. Next thing when me check she status she hab up subben a say how “Some man always wa in and out ya hole but cya buy you one little gift for Valentines.”

MUB, tell me that anna stupidness! Just because mi na buy one gift fu she my cya get sex!