Dear MUB,

I‘m going to explain to you exactly what happened and I want you to tell me if I went too far. I’ve been with my girl for over 4 years. She has been begging for us to move in together but I told her I’m not 100% comfortable with the way she does things so I’m kinda afraid.

You know about this coronavirus thing right. This afternoon I came home and met my apartment smelling strong of hand sanitizer and alcohol. MUB, it was so bad that my eyes started to water and I kept coughing. I didn’t have to think twice to know that it was the work of my wonderful girlfriend. It smelled like she washed down the entire building with sanitizer. The bedroom was worse. MUB, can you believe that she sanitized my f##king bed? Who sanitized a bed? There was no way I could sleep in the bed for how wet it was.

I tried not to get upset with her because her intention was good but smfh is shit like this why I’m afraid to move in with her. She could at least say something to me. Just last week, I came home and met all my skimmed milk in the rubbish. 4 Box of brand new milk in the rubbish! Ask me why MUB! Because my wonderful girlfriend said it’s not good for me. She only wants me to drink full cream milk. Ok cool. You dash way all ma milk because you claim say it not healthy, for peace sake replace them back with full cream. That night I went to bed hungry because it was too late and I couldn’t get milk to eat my cornflakes.

OK. So she made my apartment smell like Holberton Hospital. Was I upset? Yes, but I kept it together because she is obviously looking out for me in her weird little way. MUB, I had to call her and ask her wtf when I realized that she left my Penis vacuum pump soaking in alcohol. I rushed to take it out but it was too late. Alcohol had already gotten into the electronics so it wasn’t working.  MUB is one of the latest brands and I had plans to and use it. Only to find out that my wonderful girlfriend f it up.

That was it. I called her and told her I was coming for my key. MUB, that’s where I draw the line. If it’s not one thing, it’s the other with her. I let her know that I tried my best to endure her wonderfulness over the years but at the end of the day, I’m always left to suffer. I broke up with her and I took back my apartment key. Was I wrong?